We know lots of people find it difficult to know the right thing to say if someone they care about is self-harming. Dr Amir Khan shares some tips to help you have that conversation.
Tips for having a conversation about self-harm
Understanding how to have conversations about self-harm is really important in reducing the stigma that can be a huge barrier to people opening up and getting support with it.
To get started you can:
- Show you care - Feeling listened to and cared for can help someone recover. Let them know you're there if they need to talk more.
- Let them know you won't judge - The stigma around self-harm can cause embarrassment or shame, you might even find someone ends up being apologetic. Let them know there's nothing to apologise for and you're there to help.
- Do your best to stay calm - Reacting in anger might shut down important conversations. It's normal to feel a range of emotions, but acting with care and kindness could help someone feel safe to open up
- Listen - Really the most important thing is to listen, you don't have to solve anything. The thing people mostly need is to be able to talk about how they're feeling.
- Acknowledge their feelings - Self-harm is a sign of serious emotional distress. Asking questions about how someone is feeling might help them feel heard and more comfortable opening up.
We're not afraid to talk about self-harm
We're here to listen, whatever you're dealing with at the moment
You can speak to us if:
- You’re having thoughts of harming yourself
- You’re trying to distract yourself from self-harming
- You have self-harmed
If you or someone you care about is struggling with self-harm and you need someone to listen, we’re here on 116 123.